


Society By day

by Sherlockia903



Category: Parade's End - All Media Types, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-23
Updated: 2014-03-19
Packaged: 2018-01-09 18:19:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 20,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1149274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sherlockia903/pseuds/Sherlockia903
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A girl with a strange past, finally gets given her dream job of being in special effects make up, she meets her idol that she always had feelings for ever since she saw him in 'hawking' but her depressive past covers her feelings when she and Benedict cumberbatch meet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

25\. today was her 25th birthday and what was she supposed to feel? achieve for that matter. Her name was Imogen, she had just finished university on art and design and was out looking for a job. she lived in the heart of London with her parents. now 25 and still living with her parents. what a loser. she thought. but she had no courage and after what had happened with what she thought was true love, she was totally obliviated. confidence, courage, heart and soul, leaving nothing but the empty shell of her chubby body. she looked in the mirror. she had lost so much weight with Haydn, as he was called. and now she was back to her old self as if he never happened. she sighed, brushed her short brown hair and went down stairs.  
"happy birthday sweetheart!" her mother cooed as she walked into the dinning room, to find a plate full of eggs, bacon and toast. she smiled.  
"hi mum" and sat in front of her plate. she didn't eat anything but merely poke the yoke of her egg with her fork.  
"now, we got a lovely day planned out for you, all complete surprises! so you go ahead and finish your breakfast and we'll be straight out!" Imogen looked at her mother. always the optimist. she thought her mother was very Effie trinket from the hunger games, but just very plane. she could be fancy when she wanted to be, but that was only on rare occasions. her thoughts where interrupted when her father walked in, still in his dressing gown and slippers. Imogen stood up.  
"happy birthday darling" and he kissed her on the cheek. Imogen was more of a daddy's girl. he sat down next to her and pulled out his packet of fags. Imogen pulled out her tobacco and they where soon both smoking like chimneys. Imogen's mother gave a grimace.  
"I really do think you should smoke outside. you should both stop all together." she said in a snobby voice.  
"you can't really talk mum, considering you have the odd fag on the occasion. there's no point in hiding them" she replied. her mum didn't say anything. after a minuet of silence, she sighed.  
"its your birthday, so I suppose you can say anything" her dad chuckled as he was halfway through his paper.  
half an hour later they where on the bus and about to have a day in London. they went up the aquarium, then to the globe to catch a show of Romeo and Juliet, which was fine, as Imogen was so numb from all the feelings because of Haydn, she didn't seem to mind. after a day out, they decided to end it with a ride on the London eye. they where all silent. starring quietly on the sight of London. then, something caught Imogen's eye. there seemed to be a small notice board with a list of people needed for jobs. after looking through it, she found they where quite, classy jobs in high places that needed a degree from university's. then she saw it.   
"job needed. special effects make up artist needed in Longcross studios for new film"  
her eyes scanned it and the number at the bottom. she took a picture of it on her phone and turned to her parents starring at her.  
Imogen smiled a real smile for the first time in months.  
"mum, dad, I think I just found myself the perfect job"


	2. Chapter 2

They where on the bus home when Imogen's mother turned around to face her.  
"so what did you find on the eye then?" she asked. Imogen huffed and took her headphones off. she hated when people talked to her when she was listening to music. especially on bus or car journeys.  
"I think I found my self a job mum. it includes a degree on what I have, i just took a picture to get their number so I can call about the job" she replied.  
"well what are they asking for?" more questions. Imogen was getting more annoyed now.  
"they want a special effects make up artist" she replied looking out the window. Imogen's mother raised her eyebrows.  
"well, that sounds right up you're street then, darling" she sounded enthusiastic for her daughter.  
"mm-hm" she mumbled and slipped her headphones back on.  
they soon were walking through their front door to their house. Imogen walked right up to the computer, planning on spending the rest of the evening on it.  
"what would you like for tea, Hun?" her mother bothered her again. Imogen took her headphones off and spun the chair round to face her mum.  
"I don't know. what did you have in mind?" she replied with a look of pure boredom on her face.  
"well, what would you like? there's a nice Chinese around the corner, or theirs domino's?" she offered the suggestions. Imogen shrugged.  
"I dunno, Domino's sounds good" she said simply. she wasn't majorly hungry, but she could never turn down domino's.  
"well, you're on the computer and know how they work, so if we decide on what we want on our pizzas, you order?" she asked. Imogen nodded and smiled a little. her mum was turning her back.  
"mum, wait. i just want to say thanks for a great day. it was a good birthday" she stood up and held her arms out. her mother turned around and smiled and walked into her daughters arms. she stroked her dark brown hair.  
"you're very welcome dear" she whispered and smiled. suddenly her mum remembered something.  
"oh yes, I haven't given you you're other little present" and she ran into the kitchen and came back out with a small box, un-wrapped. she handed it to Imogen. it was a box of cosmic blue hair dye.  
"you said you wanted to dye you're hair. i think this color would look good on you" she smiled.  
"thanks mum. I'll try this out later" and Imogen slumped back into her seat as her mum walked out the room. she sat there for a moment and remembered why her mother had been bothering her. she soon remembered and took her phone out. she wrote the number down from the photo and dialed the number in. she lifted the phone to her ear. she was a little nervous, but she was confident in her formal vocabulary. finally, the other end picked up.  
"hello, this is Longcross studio's. how may I help you?" it was a woman at the end of the line. she sounded as if she were in her mid thirty's and had a rather snobbish accent.  
"Yes, I caught you're advertisement about the Job for the special effects make up artist" Imogen replied.  
"Ah, yes. that's absolutely brilliant, no one has acquired about the job yet. now, you will have to go to an Interview, of that i can set up. But first, i need to ask a couple of questions. Name?" her voice softened. Imogen sighed a small sigh of relief.  
"Imogen Maddeline Edwards"   
"date of birth?"   
" twenty sixth of June, nineteen eighty eight" she spoke.   
she could hear her typing on her computer   
"ok. could I also get you're email address?"  
"yes, it's Imogen.Edwards903@hotmail.co.uk"  
"brilliant, you're Interview is next Tuesday at 9.30am. More details will be sent to you on you're email oh and it will help if you bring you're CV"   
"ok, thank you very much"   
"Ok, goodbye" and she hung up the phone. Imogen sighed as she put her phone down. her mum soon walked in.  
"you got the job then?" she asked. Imogen nodded.  
"good, well, you better order that pizza then" Imogen smiled and got back to her normal life.


	3. Chapter 3

The loud sound of Imogen's favorite song blasted from her phone at seven o clock in the morning. She turned over and fiddled with her phone, making the annoying sound of Bob Marley stop. she sat up and Looked around her room. it had 3 cream white walls and a chocolate brown wall were her bed stood. she stood up and walked over to her vivairian and and peered through the glass to look at her beautiful orange corn snake, sleeping soundly on his heat mat.  
"wish I was in you're position, buddy" and she turned the light on. she walked over to her mirror. other than a chocolate colored desk and wardrobe , her walls we're held with pictures of her and childhood friends and deceased members of her family. two posters hung from her brown wall, a Sherlock poster, With the tall slim and sexy Benedict cumber batch starring at the other wall, with Martin Freeman standing to the side of him. and the other of her favorite cartoon, adventure time. to the other walls, hung another two posters, both of the Beatles. They matched with several of the biographies on the shelf, bag on the end of her bed, and the t-shirts in her wardrobe. she looked in the mirror, sighed, and walked into the bathroom, wearing nothing but her Bring me the Horizon T-shirt and her knickers. she washed her face, forced deodorant under her arms and brushed her teeth, running back into her room and changing into her 'smart' clothes, ready for the Interview for the make up artist job. the week had gone by so fast, but it usually did when Imogen had her friends over. she loved them, but Gemma was crazy, hyper and laughing like a Hyena twenty four seven. occasionally, Imogen showed the same traits as her, but Gemma was messy, sometimes rude, although she never meant it and not to mention. loud. she placed her top over head head, and did her make up. It was a black and white stripped shirt, made of cotton, bunched at the short sleeves. the length of of it stopped a few inches over her bum, with small pockets on the bottom. she wore black leggings with short little healed ankle boots. she looked at her self and thought of Haydn. wondering where he was and what he was doing. she shook her head and pushed him out of her thoughts. she couldn't keep doing this, not with him. she had to move on. she picked her phone up from her bedside table, along with her headphones and went downstairs for breakfast.  
***  
It took two hours on the bus to get to the Longcross studios, but she got there on time. she looked at her watch, 9:20am. she could have time for a quick fag. she looked around the entrance, trying to find a bin with an ash tray on, and scanning the area for other smokers. luckily, she saw a bin and the sign 'smoking area' painted on the wall. she went over, took a seat and rolled a fag up. As she lit it, she realized there was another person standing next to her, also smoking. she had shoulder length hair, blond and was rather tall and skinny. she wore a black pencil skirt, with cream tights and a deep blue blazer, followed by a pair of black stilettos. she caught Imogen's gaze and smiled. she was quite young.  
"hello, Haven't seen you around here before, you new?" her voice was very British. very formal. she reminded Imogen of one of those bond girls. Imogen snapped out of her gaze and smiled back.  
"yer, I have my interview for a job here" she replied and took a drag off her fag.  
"oh, that's good. what you going for?" she asked.  
"Make up artist" she replied simply. she smiled and breathed out the smoke.  
"nice, I'm on stage set up, literally right next door to Make up. The names Lisa."   
"Imogen" and she finished her fag, flicking it on the floor and standing up.  
Lisa dropped her fag and stood on it.  
"i'll show you to reception" and she began walking to the grand doors of the studio. she followed her to the big, silver room, with many doors around the circular edge.   
"this is where I leave you, catch you later?" she asked and smiled. Imogen nodded and said goodbye.  
She watched her walking through one of the many brown colored doors and looked around. she sighed in relief as she saw the reception desk in the center of the room. she walked over and the lady looked up and smiled.  
"hi, how can I help?" she asked. she looked the same age as Lisa, only with dark drown hair, tied back in a strong pony tail. she wore a pink satin shirt, buttoned up to the color, with smart black trousers.   
"hi, um, yes. I'm here for my Interview about the make up artist job?" she replied a little nervous.  
"oh yes, name?" she asked.  
"Imogen, Imogen Edwards" she spoke.  
"ah, yes. right on time. go through that door and keep going until the end of the corridor, first door to you're right." and she pointed to one of the doors on the walls. Imogen nodded and said thanks. she walked towards the door and through the corridor. to her right, was sets of films and television programs, to her left, were large posters of more films and TV shows that had been broad cast here. she stopped and looked at one. It was a poster for the show 'Parade's End' of witch Imogen had seen over hundreds of times. not just because of Benedict's good looks, but also because of the story lines. a devoting husband and father who sticks to monogamy while his wife sleeps with as many men as she can? what's not to love? she smiled and chuckled slightly. whenever she had a new obsession, or an old one that popped up again, she went straight home to find some fan fiction.   
"something funny with the way I look?" a deep, memorable, voice spoke behind her. Imogen knew who it was. her heart racing within his words.  
she turned slowly, to find him standing there. the one, the only Benedict Cumberbatch.


	4. Chapter 4

Imogen stood as still as she possible could. he just stood there and smiled. he soon knitted his eyebrows together.  
"hello? you okay? are you lost?" his deep voice ringing in her ears. she breathed in and made a run for it down the corridor. she looked back, she saw him still standing there, with confusion on his face. she breathed in and straightened herself up. she knocked on the door twice. there was a muffled 'come in' and she opened the door, she took one more glanced at him and walked in. the room was a chocolate brown, round with smooth, wooden floorboards. in the center, was a large silver table, with three men sitting in suits with paperwork in front of them. the Middle man stood up as Imogen shut the door behind her.  
"ah, you must be Imogen, yes?" he spoke in a soft, friendly voice. he held out his hand.  
"yes, yes I am" and she smiled. she walked up to the table and shook hands.  
"I am Mr Ridge, but call me Tom. these are my fellow co workers, Mr Leann and Mr Meek" he introduced the others. they both stood and shook hands. soon, they we're all sitting back down, along with Imogen, sitting in the silver chair opposite the three men. Tom cleared his throat.  
"so, it seems you are the only applicant for the Job. tell me, what have been you're past experiences?" tom asked, preparing to take down notes.  
"well, I have just graduated from south Hampton university and have two degrees for art and design. I also took media studies in collage and got three distinctions. I have had a few jobs, mostly waitress and working in shops" she took out her portfolio of her art work and handed it to tom. he opened it and flicked through the pages.  
"I am also an team player and will work well with others" she smiled.  
"what hobbies do you do?" asked Mr Leann.  
"I take up crafts, that include drawing, painting, knitting and sewing. I also like long bike rides and I have taken singing classes" she finished. there were a few minutes of silence. Tom looked up after taking notes.  
"well, you seem to know what you are doing. I think you have earned the Job here and now." he smiled. Imogen's heart beat rose with excitement.  
"now, everyone in the make up department gets given a particular person to work on, such as cuts and bruises, basic make up for a shine effect for the cameras and so on. so let me just look up who you will be working on" and he opened up another file within his paper work.  
"ah yes. you will be working on Benedict Cumberbatch. you lucky thing, many girls would kill for you're position" he chuckled. Imogen's heart stopped. oh no. this couldn't be happening. she would muck it up on her first day with nerves of meeting her hero.  
"problem?" Tom asked, as he saw the shock on Imogen's face. Imogen snapped out of her trance and smiled.  
"no, no problem at all." she finished.  
"Okay, well, here is you're file on what Things you will have to do on him, also locations we will be going to shoot different shots for the film. Just report to stage make up everyday, sign in and get to work. now, why don't we show you around, Introduce you to our staff" he smiled. Imogen nodded. she collected her things, placed them into her bag and walked out the room with the three men. they walked along the corridor that showed the sets of certain Film and television shows that she saw earlier. they walked into one of the sets and followed into a small path that led behind it. it soon let to a bigger corridor and they were eventually in the make up department. It was a big white room, with hundreds of props and costumes, hanging up on coat hangers on large racks. there were three large mirrors with several light bulbs around it. the desks in front of them were cluttered with thousands of make up cases, lip sticks, foundation powders and creams. glasses of facial features, such as moles and mustaches.  
"This, Imogen, is where you will be working from now on. you stick to this place only, unless you are asked to deliver costumes or props to other parts of the studios. but, not to worry, you wont be asked to do much delivering until much later on. for now, you stick to here" Tom explained.   
he turned as he heard footsteps and in walked Benedict.   
"ah! Ben! just the man we was looking for. Ben, This is Imogen, she will be working on you're make up for the film. Imogen, I think you know who this is" Tom introduced them.  
"oh hello, We met briefly in the corridor, but you ran away" He spoke in his normal voice and smiled. the three men looked at her with confusion.  
"I-I-I was going to be late for my interview." she gently laughed nervously. awkward silence. Then Tom laughed and slapped his arm around her shoulder, making her jump.  
"hard working this on is, glad I picked you for the Job!" he smiled and released her from his grip.  
"now, Ben, why don't you show her around some more. me and my colleagues have some more work to do" and with that, all three men walked off, leaving Ben and Imogen in an empty room.  
Ben turned to Imogen.  
"going to be honest, they showed you all that is needed of you. fancy a coffee?" he smiled. oh god, oh god, oh god. this is NOT happening. Imogen screamed in her head. one thing she was very good at, was hiding her emotion on her face. she smiled a small smile and nodded.  
They both made there way through the long corridor and out to the reception desk room. Imogen saying nothing as they made there way to the cafe. when they reached it, the room was hot and stuffy, and Imogen realized she was wearing her fully, beautifully groomed, black winters coat. it was very much like Sherlock's only shorter and had a zip and no buttons. without the buttons and the large pockets, it was very similar to his in the TV show. Benedict was wearing a light buttoned blue shirt and a pair of jeans. they both found a small empty table and sat down.  
"aren't you hot? maybe you should take you're coat off" he suggested. oh no. she couldn't. she was wearing short sleeves that showed off her arms. and her arms were not exactly pretty. covered in scars and cuts, right up to the elbow. she sighed. well, she couldn't hide it from him forever. she unzipped the coat slowly, she could feel his eyes on her. and she gently shimmied off her coat. she pushed it backwards of the chair and stuck her arms out of his view under the table and smiled. he got up.   
"what do you want? coffee?"  
"just a tea for me please. milk and two sugars" and she smiled. he smiled back and turned his back as he walked up to the counter.  
luckily, he didn't notice the scars. not yet anyway. he returned as a few minutes passed and placed the cup of tea in front of her. she starred at it for a few minutes, knowing she would have to use her arms and put them in plain sight for him to see.   
"drink it before it gets cold" he chuckled. Imogen smiled a little.  
"you sound like my mother" she chuckled. but it soon faded as she took a deep breath and laid her arms on the table to touch her mug. she could sense Him looking at them. she glanced up to find him starring at her, all but a serious face starring right back at her.


	5. Chapter 5

Imogen starred at him. she could feel her eyes watering.  
"Imogen.." he began. Imogen breathed in and shook her head.  
"it's fine. they are old. nothing new. I'm fine" she starred at her tea now.  
"sorry, I didn't mean to emotionally point it out" he spoke quietly.   
"It's OK. you're not the first. their just scars from school. I got bullied a lot. but that was nearly ten years ago. scars fade but never really go, so.." she trailed off and took a sip of her drink.  
"so, I heard you're going to be Smaug in the next hobbit film" Imogen started up after a few quiet minutes, trying to break the awkwardness and change the subject.  
"err, yes, yes I am. and its pronounced Smaug" He replied. Imogen made a grimace.  
"well, I always pronounced it as Smaug when I read the books. well, when I say I, I meant my sister. she used to read me the Lord of the rings books, and the hobbit when I was younger. she always pronounced it Smaug." she explained. the then smiled.  
"and Don't even get me started on how my sister pronounced Hermione's name from the harry potter books" they both laughed.  
"so, tell me more about you, you seem to know a lot about me. and, considering we are working together, I like to get to know my colleges"  
he said in His Sherlock voice.   
"what happened to the person before me?" she laughed. Ben smiled.  
"she ran off and got married. nine weeks pregnant" he replied simply.  
Imogen didn't say anything but simply smiled. finally Ben spoke up.  
"do you want to go and get lunch, instead of this place?" he asked and they were both walking out the door of the cafe.

 

***  
Imogen sat up at the bar, drinking a double vodka that lay in front of her. she sighed and rubbed her eyes with her index finger and thumb. she turned around as she heard the loud sounds of heels being smashed against the floor. Imogen slightly brightened up.  
"hey bitch!" yelled her oldest friend, Sophie. Imogen stood up as was rammed in by the blond.   
"hey..." she sighed. Sophie frowned.  
"okay, whats wrong?" and they both took there seats at the bar. Before Imogen could say anything, the bartender came up to them.  
"what can I get for you two fine laddies?" he asked in a Scottish accent. he was rather skinny, with short ginger hair, with a ginger stubble.  
"V & T for me please, same for this girl right her. make it strong" she replied. he nodded and walked away to sort the drinks out.  
"so whats up?" she asked. Imogen looked at her best friend. she was looking really nice today. a black and white stripped top, nearly the same as her's as she wore on her first day on her job. she wore dark blue jeans with light blue converse. she wore very light make up. hardly any eye liner with a light purple shadow that hung on her eye lids.   
"nothing, really." Imogen replied. Sophie starred at her, un convinced.  
"come on, whats up? you have the perfect job, you're working on the guy you're had a major crush on since throughout school life. you have parents who love you, and you finally died you're hair black! how can you be un happy?" she debated. Imogen sighed.  
"you know why" she whispered. the bartender came back and placed two drinks in front of them.  
"thanks, put them on my tab. Sophie Spencer" she ordered. The bartender looked at the depressed Imogen. he nodded and walked away. Sophie looked back at her.  
"Haydn" she didn't even ask.   
"you get news from him then?" she asked this time. Imogen shook her head.  
"nope. nothing. but ever since he left, I can't be in a relationship the same way. I feel like i'm completely destroyed" she sighed and straightened up. she coughed a little.  
"you need to forget about him. seriously. everyone, in their lives, finds someone they want to spend the rest of their lives with and put so much effort into loving them. it's just some people, sooner or later, find out they can use you're vulnerability and stomp on their hearts. he don't deserve you. he never did."   
Imogen sighed.  
"yer, I know. but I still cant get over it. it was such a big deal for me. know one understood. how's you and Jacob?" she asked. trying to change the subject.  
"yer, we're good. oh, OH. I ALMOST FORGOT!" she nearly yelled. she was obviously getting excited over something. she held out her left hand. Imogen almost fainted. instead she let out a shriek or happiness. she stuffed her hand over her mouth.  
"oh my god, Sophie! when the hell did this happen?!" she laughed happily, examining the ring. it was a thin, golden band, with a small blue jewel in the middle. Sophie laughed.  
"Last night. it was so romantic" and she soon began explaining how he did it. half an hour later of her mumbling and Imogen nodding her head and not really listening but still showing an interest. she soon stopped and her face dropped.  
"oh, oh my god. I-I'm so sorry. I didn't, I shouldn't-" she began. Imogen held her hand up.  
"it's OK, really. it is. Besides, two weeks into my Job and me and Benedict are getting on like a house on fire." Imogen laughed. Sophie grimaced but then smiled.  
"well, here's the best part. you will be my maid of honor!" she squeaked. Imogen did the same and they were getting over excited. they ordered another drink and drank it.  
"oh, crap, I got to go, Jacob and I are going out for dinner tonight and iv only got half an hour to get back and make my self into a glamour model. we'll talk about meeting up this weekend on face book tomorrow, but I really gotta go" Sophie explained. she hugged her friend, kissed her on the cheek, waved and walked out the door.  
Imogen sighed. she was happy for her friend. deeply. but it made her feel even more alone than ever. she soon continued drinking and drinking and drinking, into the night a head.


	6. chapter 6

Imogen woke upon her bed the next morning. she opened her tired eyes and sat up, with the loud banging pound of a drum going off within side of her head. she looked around to find her in her room. god, how wasted did I get last night? she thought. she moved her legs to the edge of the bed and stood slowly, looking in the mirror opposite. she was a mess. she was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, only half of her t-shirt was stained in stale, dried vomit. her hair was everywhere, and dark rings hung beneath her eyes. she sighed. she picked her phone up, that was at her bedside and looked at the time. nine thirty. not bad, she didn't get too wasted that her hangover trapped her in bed till one in the after noon. still, she knew her parents were downstairs and she wanted to make an impression. how did she even get home? she wondered. she shook the questions of last night out of her head and stripped. she soon had the shower running, which woke her up and soon, she was sober enough to walk downstairs and gather her senses. she walked into the dinning room to find three people at the table.  
"morning mum, morning dad, morning Ben" she casually said, not really bothering to look at their faces and making her way to the kettle so she could make some coffee. half way through making it, she stopped. wait, BEN?! what was HE doing here?! her mind screamed. she turned around to properly face them. Ben, was smugly sitting on her seat of the table, looking clean, and wearing casual clothing.  
"OK, would someone please care to explain why my work colleague is sitting at the table, in my house, having breakfast?" Imogen moaned, eyes half closed and eyebrows knitted together.  
"Ben found you roaming the streets of London on you're own last night. completely drunk out of you're mind. thankfully, he found you're phone and called me." her mother said in a stern voice.  
"oh great, here we go, an intervention" Imogen whined and let out a huff of annoyance.   
"Imogen, it's not the fact that you were drinking, it was the fact of you getting plastered on you're own. anything could of happened" her dad spoke up. Imogen, being brought up with manners and a understanding on things, simply sighed. she walked over and wrapped her arms around her mother.  
"I know, I'm sorry mum, It was a moment of weakness" she spoke meaningfully. she then whispered into her mums ear the word 'Haydn' and her mum understood and nodded her head. she pulled back a chair and let Imogen sit down. Imogen looked up at Ben.  
"thanks Ben, I guess I owe you one" Imogen smiled. Ben smiled back and made Imogen's heart skip a beat. they starred at each other for two minutes when Imogen's dad interrupted by a slight cough.   
"so, what are you up to today?" her dad started. Imogen looked at her watch which also had the date on it. it was a Saturday, her day off.   
"well its my day off. I have no clue. can't go back to sleep, never do when I wake up." Imogen replied simply.  
"well, why don't you take Ben out? go and get Lunch as a Thank you gift, you did say you owe him one, love" her dad smirked as Imogen's cheeks turned bright red.  
"oh, you don't have to, I just did what I thought was right" he smiled. Imogen shook her head.  
"no Ben, I owe you. We'll pop into town later on, please. it's the least thing I could do. I'm not taking No for an answer. Besides, I have an appointment at the tattoo shop today" Imogen spoke.  
"and I could use the support" she pleaded. Ben laughed.  
"OK, this will be fun" he replied.  
"tattoo? oh god, Imogen" he mother began.  
"don't worry mum, I'm getting one that really means something to me" Imogen looked at her mother.  
"you said that about the other ones!" she laughed.  
"you have other tattoos?" Ben asked as he raised an eye brow. Imogen smiled and roller her short sleeves up, revealing two tattoos on the top of each arm.  
"this one, shows I'm a slytherin. massive harry potter fan here" Ben started laughing.  
"same here" he nodded while smiling.   
"then, this one, well, um, I'm a big fan..." she trailed off. her other arm showed the symbol of the icon symbol of Sherlock. she had a small dark blue square with the white letters of 'I am Sherlocked' Imogen turned bright red.  
Ben was really laughing now.


	7. chapter 7

Soon, Ben and Imogen were walking out the door, on there way to spend the day out in London town, as always Imogen did.  
"so, tell me again why you're all dressed up?" Imogen asked. Ben was wearing a dark blue hoodie with a black and white scarf. followed by a red baseball hat.  
"public. can never get away from them" he replied simply. Imogen nodded her head.  
"well, you are quite an icon nowadays" Imogen spoke normally. they where soon wondering around Trafalgar square.  
"so, what did you want to do today?" Ben asked. Imogen shrugged.  
"I dunno, you hungry?" she asked. Ben raised his eye brows.  
"in honesty, not really" he replied. Imogen thought for a moment.  
"well, its London. its not like there's nothing to do." silence.   
"there's the Aquarium, or madam two swords" she suggested. Ben nodded.  
"second option sounds good. haven't been there in years" Imogen smiled. Ben smiled back, and they went up to the bus station to catch the bus to the museum as it was too far to walk. they sat there on the bus in silence. Imogen starring out the window and the world went by in a blur. soon, the bus stopped and they were standing outside the building. Imogen looked at the Que for the entry. it was practically empty.  
"thank god no ones there. these lines can take all day to wait" Imogen piped up. Ben nodded.  
"I agree, come on, before the public changes there mind" he smiled and they went into the building. they both paid for there tickets and were roaming around. Imogen was really enjoying it, because the place so very quiet, it was really empty.  
"it's so empty" Imogen pointed out.  
"I like it like this, just you and me" Ben muttered, going red. Imogen turned red as well but Haydn popped into her mind and didn't return the compliment. suddenly, Imogen saw something and ran towards it. there where four wax statues of the Beatles. Imogen smiled a real smile.  
"Like the Beatles?" he asked. Imogen turned around.  
"I can't express how much I love them. there my Icons" she explained happily. Ben lifted an eye brow.  
"why the Beatles?" he asked. Imogen stopped in her tracks and starred at the four wax figures.  
"when I was six, I used to have really bad anger issues. I used to punch stuff and hurt people. one day, I knocked over the music cabinet, and picked up the Sgt. peppers album. I don't know what it was about it, but i just instantly fell in love. Would not leave the house without it." She smiled a bit and looked at the floor.   
"then when mum told me it could play music, I fell in love with it even more. ever since then, she got me a different Beatles album every birthday, Christmas, Easter, even on Halloween" she looked up.  
"sounds stupid" she lost her smile a little.  
"no, no, of course it isn't. it's something you desperately love, and if it brought you up and made you a better person, I say that's something to keep with you for the rest of you're life, not stupid" Ben explained. suddenly, Imogen started to grow feelings and completely pushed Haydn our of her head. she didn't say anything for the next five minuets, until they moved on to more statues of famous people who earned there place in history. Then, Imogen started blurting out facts on the Beatles. Ben actually took an interest, Imogen was thankful for that. after two hours, they decided they had seen everything and they both walked out of the building.  
"I think they should put you in there, along with Martin Freeman" Imogen suggested. Ben laughed.  
"I would be honored if they did, can't say the same about Martin" Ben replied as they walked the busy streets of London.   
"I'm sure he's a nice person" Imogen spoke.  
"oh he is, really, really lovely guy. he can be a little grumpy sometimes, but I'd be no where without Watson" he laughed. Imogen chuckled but stopped as her stomach began to growl. Benedict heard this.  
"you're hungry? so am I" he said. he looked at his watch.  
"blimey, its six o clock already, how long were we in there?" he smiled. Imogen shrugged.  
"so, we're you want to eat?" Imogen asked. Ben stopped for a moment  
"actually, I know this place just around the corner. it's Italian" he suggested.  
"yer, sounds good. Haven't had Italian for a while. lead the way" Imogen said and they both started walking.  
they where soon at this little restaurant around the corner. it was small, glass windows with white frames around them. above the windows, hung a sign, that read 'the Italian Place' in Green and Red letters with a broad black line around them. they both walked in, Benedict opening the door for her ask she walked in first, like a gentleman. she looked around and no one was there. all empty tables. Benedict and her walked up to the bar and waited patiently, as a short man walked up to them. he was a short, rather round man, going bold, with pure white hair, growing at the sides of his head along with a pure white mustache. he came up and asked.  
"hello, table for two?" he asked in a Italian accent. Ben removed his hat and scarf.  
"Lenny, it's me" Ben smiled. suddenly, excitement ran through 'Lenny'   
"BENNY! oh how long it hasa' been! and who's thisa', youra' girl-friend?" he smiled and shook her hand rapidly. Ben smiled.  
"no, this is my work colleague. Imogen, this is Lenny. Lenny, Imogen" he introduced them.   
"yes, yes, now, this way Benny! finest table in the house for you and you're Lady friend" and he gently pushed them towards a small booth at the back, next to the window. they both sat down, removed there coats and Lenny soon came and poured them some red wine.  
"ona' the house, for my Benny" he started.  
"and hisa' Beautiful girlfriend!" he laughed loudly.  
"I'll leave-a you two to talk-a!" and he walked away. Imogen raised her eyebrows at Ben. he laughed.  
"sorry, there's no arguing with Lenny. once he thinks of something, he confirms it in his head. good person though" he laughed and took a sip of his wine.  
"why does he love you so much, oh wait, you're a famous actor and voted one of the sexiest men in Britain since Freddie Mercury" she chuckled.  
"oh, I actually knew him from before my career. when i started doing well in the business, I gave him money to start this place up" he explained. Imogen smiled sadly and starred at her wine glass in her hand. Ben frowned.  
"okay, whats wrong?" he asked taking another sip of his wine. Imogen looked up.  
"something has been wrong ever since I met you, I could see it in you're eyes that you've been hurting" his voice softened.  
"is it me?" he asked. Imogen grimaced.  
"no, no! its not you. in fact you've made my life a bit of a laugh. something I could of needed a few months back.." she trailed off.  
"ah, OK, well, if you don't want to talk about it, I respect you're privacy" he said. Imogen nodded and the Lenny soon came back to hand them a menu each. Little did Imogen know, Ben would be finding out her dark past, later on that evening.


	8. chapter 8

Imogen and Ben were still sitting at the table. they had just both finished eating. Imogen had spaghetti with vegetarian sauce and Ben had the same but with meat in. there plates where empty but they just sat and talked. soon, they started telling funny stories.  
"so, at the end, Alfie just went 'fuck it' and stacked it!" and they where both in fits of laughter. they started to calm down and silence followed, leaving the sound of music gently playing in the background. Ben looked at Imogen.  
"so whats wrong?" he asked. Imogen sighed. she knew this moment had to come.  
"well, it would be good to get it off my chest. it's okay, i'm letting go of it slowly" she spoke quietly. Ben nodded.  
"it started off at the begging of last year. in February. me and my ex thought about giving it another go, and it was going great. then, one day, i meet him in town and he introduces me to a friend of his. the moment i saw him, i instantly fell in love. two days later me and him, Haydn, he's called, meet up and get to know each other. we kissed on our first meeting, and he made me believe he was in love with me. but I felt guilty for my ex and dumped him gently. what I didn't know, was that Haydn was going out with another girl, they had been dating for 6 months, but he told me they had started drifting apart. I was stupid, I didn't care, and we kept our relationship a secret for a little while. after the first week, we made love and he proposed. I told him it was going too fast, but he made up an excuse and I bought it because i was unconditionally in love with him" Imogen breathed in deep.  
"it was going so good for the next few weeks, then I started getting annoyed that he didn't start really accepting me as his fiance. I told him this and we got into a fight. then i heard he started flirting with my other friend. and then, I said something on that I thought would bring us closer together" Imogen paused again for a few minutes. Ben gently nudged her.  
"go on, get it off you're chest" he spoke quietly.   
"I told him I was pregnant. But from the moment I first met him, he told me he couldn't have kids, and I think that deeply killed him inside. so when I told him this, he was understanding. gave it another week and he found out I wasn't. two days later he dumped me over a text. we didn't talk for weeks. finally, when we did start talking again, he..." she trailed off. Ben took her hand.  
"go on" he whispered.  
"he left. he left for south Hampton. he started a new relationship for sure. he hasn't called me, or got in contact with me since" Imogen's eyes started watering and her bottom lip started trembling.  
"and the worst part is, he made me believe that there was still hope for us, because he said we'd always be in each other's lives, no matter what." she started crying now. most of it was because of the alcohol she had drunk with Ben, the rest, emotions built up inside for the past few months. Ben knitted his eyebrows together. he could feel what she had been through and felt bad. he felt so sorry for her.  
"he's not a nice person then. he can't just make promises like that and then abandon them when he feels like it. you didn't do anything wrong. you only did what you thought was right to keep him with you and stick to the promise of commitment" and he gently took the sobbing Imogen into his arms. she immediately fell into his embrace and inhaled his scent.  
"you need something stronger" he spoke and got Lenny over.  
"hey Lenny, could we get something stronger to drink?" he asked. he looked at Imogen, face dug into Ben's shoulder, and he nodded.  
"I know-a just the thing" he spoke and walked off to get the drinks.  
"I want to get pissed" Imogen mumbled into his hoodie. Ben nodded.  
"okay" he replied gently, with agreement in his voice.


	9. chapter 9

Drink, after drink, after drink. Imogen and Ben kept drinking through the night. downing shots of vodka and other mixed liquids. Ben knew he was drunk, but not as drunk as Imogen. soon, Lenny came over.  
"I think-a you best take-a her home-a, Benny" he spoke in his strong Italian accent. Ben nodded and gently pulled Imogen's coat over her, pulling her arms through the sleeves and pulling the zip up.  
"come on then, Immy" he spoke. Imogen turned, with unfocused eyes but a dark look on her face.  
"DON'T.EVER.CALL.ME.IMMY!" she screeched, and fell into Ben's strong arms.  
"OK, I'm sorry" he spoke gently. he wished Lenny a good night as he paid for the meal and soon, Ben half carrying Imogen down the street. he was getting close to the bus stop, when a person shouted out. 'OH MY GOD, ITS BENEDICT!" he yelled and soon a whole group of people where running after him. he turned to the drunk girl in his arms.  
"we need to run!" he spoke into her ear. he had forgotten to put his disguise back on when he was leaving Lenny's. Imogen knitted her eyebrows together, her eyes half closed. she didn't know what was going on. Ben sighed and flung her over his shoulder. he began running as fast as he could. he soon got to the right bus, jumped inside and ran straight to the back. he laid Imogen on the back seat and ducked down to watch all his fans run right pass. he walked up to the driver.  
"sorry about that, umm, two adult singles please" he ordered and got his wallet out. the driver starred at him.  
"bloody hell! it's Sherlock bleedin' Holmes!" the driver spoke. Benedict shushed him and gave him another tenner.  
"please, I have a very drunk friend with me and with my celebrity status, I don't want to put her in more danger" he spoke loud enough for only the driver to hear. he nodded.  
"don't worry sir, I'll get you there in a jiffy!" he spoke with confidence.  
he smiled and walked down the Isle to find Imogen awake and sitting up right.  
"hey, you okay?" he asked and sat next to her. she nodded briefly.  
"head hurts a bit but I'm okay. what happened?" she asked. Ben looked at her.  
"fans. I forgot to put my disguise on before we left the Italian place and people recognised me" he spoke. Imogen nodded and rested her head on his shoulder.  
"thanks." she said.  
"for what?" he asked.  
"for being there when I needed someone the most" she replied. not looking up but simply starring a head.  
"you're welcome" he spoke softly and wrapped his arms around her as the bus made its journey to home.


	10. chapter 10

When they both got off the bus, it was raining. they had to walk a few more yards and they would be on the right street. Ben kept his arms around her.  
"damn it! I should of nicked my Sherlock coat from the BBC studios, it could have kept us a little dry." he yelled over the thunder. Imogen laughed.  
"or an umbrella could have been useful as well!" she replied. Ben laughed. they were so close home now, when Imogen saw the corner shop was still open.  
"hang on, I need to get more fags!" she yelled over more thunder and they walked into the shop together. it was dry and warm and Imogen could reach into her pocket to get her purse out.  
an Old Indian man stood behind the desk. he was rather large and had a mid length fluffy grey beard along with a orange turban with small glasses. he smiled as he saw Imogen walk in.  
" hello Ron!" she said cheerfully as she walked up to the counter.  
"oh hello Imogen! you been okay? how's the family?" he asked in a Indian accent.  
"good, good. all fine. anyway, any chance I could get a twenty five grams of Cutter's Choice? along with some green Rizzlas and a medium bottle of Smirnoff?" she Asked. he nodded and got all the things she needed from the shelves. he pressed the buttons on the till and the price popped up on the little screen.  
"twenty three pounds and thirty pence please" he asked and she placed the cash in front of him.  
"would you like a bag?" he asked. she nodded and with a quick goodbye, her and benedict where walking out the door. it was still raining. they didn't say anything until they got to her house. she opened the door for them and they where welcome to pitch black.  
"god, what time is it?" Imogen asked. Ben took his IPhone out.  
"Christ, its half twelve" he replied. Imogen took her coat and hung it on the radiator.  
"its always cold downstairs. come on, we'll go up to my room" she took the bag and lead Ben up the stairs into her chocolate and cream wall coloured bedroom. Ben smiled as he saw the Sherlock poster on her wall. Imogen noticed this and smiled.  
"kind of a fan..." she smiled. she reached over and flicked the light switch. nothing happened. Imogen huffed.  
"great. powers out. luckily I got candles" and she went over to light them with her lighter. soon, they where both sitting on her bed in candle light, taking sips out of the bottle of Smirnoff.  
"do you smoke?" she asked as she began rolling up a fag. Ben nodded.  
"only if I have to in my work" he replied.  
"you don't mind if I do, do you?" she asked. he shook his head. she was soon smoking away. she soon finished it and they began drinking again.   
"no, but, seriously, I love you're work" she smirked. Ben smiled.  
"and when I got the job, I had a major fan girl freak out. really, I did!" she squeaked.  
"I'm flattered" he replied.  
"I just loved you in Parade's end..." she grew a little quiet then.  
"I don't know what it was about that. I guess that was when I..." she trailed off. Ben tiled his head.  
"hmm?" he hummed. Imogen took another sip of Smirnoff.  
"fell absolutely in love with you" she finished. Ben raised his eyebrows slightly.  
"I know its really weird, and believe me some of the fan fiction I wrote was-" but she was soon cut of as Ben leaned over and gently pressed her lips on hers. Imogen's insides exploded! she was cursing and screaming in her mind. SHE WAS SNOGGING SHERLOCK! this just doesn't happen in real life! she moved her hand up around his neck. his beautiful muscular neck. he stopped and removed his lips from hers an inch away.  
"I, I didn't just ask you out for lunch as a friend when I first met you. you can guess how I feel for you.." and he pressed his lips against hers again. ok, It was official, she had died and gone to Benedict heaven.


	11. chapter 11

Imogen laid spread out on the bed, the bottle of Smirnoff had been pushed off the bed and was now split all over carpet. but Imogen and Ben didn't care. Imogen was sprawled out on the bed, with Ben laying on top of her. Kissing. his lips where so gentle and synced so beautiful against hers. he moved his hands down her waist. Imogen's woman hood was exploding inside. she could feel her wetness growing, only because she knew Sherlock was most likely about to fuck her. his gently kissing soon became urgent, and he slid his gentle tongue into her mouth. there tongues danced together so well. Ben soon stopped and looked down at Imogen's face. his lightly blue/ grey eyes starred into identical ones. Imogen moved her hand up to his face and gently stroked his pale cheek bones. he kissed her lips again, and then moved down to her jaw line, and finally her neck. she lifted her legs up and felt him get comfy in between them. his hands moved up to her breasts and very slowly and gently massaged them. Imogen moaned in pleasure as he did, while kissing her neck. suddenly, Ben pulled Imogen up, and she was soon sitting on his lap, face to face with the candle light shinning on one side of their faces. they starred at each other again. it felt so right, and for the first time in a long time, Imogen felt like she was finally over Haydn.  
"do you want this?" Ben whispered.  
"I just want you." she replied also in a whisper. they where soon kissing again. Ben moved his hands down to the hem of her shirt and pulled it up, gently removing it from her torso over her head. he threw it on the floor and starred at her rather large breasts that rest in her black lacy bra. they where soon both completely naked, and they both starred at each other. Imogen ran her hands over Ben's, now muscular, torso. lightly moving her fingers over the basic lines of muscles. Ben shuddered. Imogen looked up into his face.  
"you have such beautiful body proportions..." she trailed off. he smiled and began rubbing his hands over her arms, leading up to her torso. he pressed his lips against her's gently, and moved his hands down to her breasts. Imogen closed her eyes and moaned into his mouth as he did wonderful work with his fingers. he gently pushed her back and was once again laying on top of her. he then moved one hand up and gently weaved his fingers into her short black hair and the other hand trailing down to her waist band of her leggings. he slithered his fingers under them and into her undergarments. she could soon feel his hands on her entrance. she flinched when this happened. Ben smiled. he raised his head up to her ear.  
"bodies so Freaking soft, I can't wait to turn you on..." he began reciting Genius he read out loud on the Jimmy Kimmel show, while still working the magic with his fingers. Imogen's breath became ragged. she knitted her eyebrows together and strongly wrapped her arms around him rather tightly. she hadn't been with another man in this way since Haydn, and that was nearly two years ago. also it was the fact that this beautiful man, whom she had sexual dreams over countless times, was now fingering her on her bed was driving her sexual instinct levels off the chart. and the best part was, even with her eye's closed, she knew it was him. Imogen covered the side of his head with kisses and buried the side of her face within his black curls that gently swung from his head down passed his ears. he lifted his head from her ear and deeply kissed her. he moved his hand from her woman hood and shifted his naked proportions between Imogen's legs. Ben held his face over Imogen's face.  
"Open you eyes" he whispered. Imogen hesitated. she only ever opened her eyes during sex once, and that was with Haydn.  
"please..." he whispered again, his voice more vulnerable in a pleading whisper. Imogen gently breathed in and opened her eyes. he gently smirked and kissed her on her forehead, but stopped and looked back down into her eyes. Imogen could feel her cheeks going red.  
"are you embarrassed?" he asked in his sweet quiet voice and gently trailed his fingers over her cheeks. Imogen tried to hide a smile but failed and she was beaming up at him, but it soon calmed down and she nodded gently.  
"why?" he asked. Imogen didn't reply. he moved his lips to her neck and tenderly kissed it, making her moan gently in pleasure.  
"there's nothing to be embarrassed about, it's just you and me..." he spoke into her neck between kisses. he moved his head up to level with hers, and gently shifted again. Imogen should feel him and his sexual intentions at her entrance. Imogen breathed in, moved her arms under his and began rubbing his back, and braced her self what was about to come next. Ben moved his head down, pressed his lips to hers and entered her. Imogen wasn't a virgin, but after a long period without sex, she felt as if she was. she nearly screamed out a really loud moan. luckily, Benedict muffled his with his lips. he stopped all motion in his body for a minute letting Imogen get used to his rather large man hood. he removed his lips from hers and left her breathing heavily and fast. Ben expressed a worried look.  
"are you okay? do you want me to-" but was cut off when she smashed his lips against his, and he took that as a order to keep going. with every gentle thrust, they both embraced, they took in every movement, every scent. Imogen starred into the face of the man she had loved for nearly a life time. they changed positions, so that Imogen was sitting on Ben's lap. legs wrapped around Ben's waist with Ben sitting up right, gently bouncing her on his pelvis, his hands moved all across her naked body. Imogen's hands wrapped around his neck and her nails gently digging into his back, scratching and rubbing his bare flesh. they had been at it for nearly an hour. finally, Imogen felt her walls close tightly around Ben's cock. she started breathing out little moans and trying to say the words,  
"I'm going to cum" but she couldn't make all of the sentence out. With a couple of Grunts from Ben, Imogen soon came and Ben followed with a final grunt, deep inside her. they both stopped and let each other catch there breaths, still in the same position. finally, Ben gently gave her a kiss, and laid her down. he slid down next to her and pulled the covers over both of them. he moved his arm under her head and pulled her into his chest. she let the aftershock kick in and let her ragged breaths come out rapidly. Ben knitted his eyebrows together and was about to ask, but he didn't need too. he knew it involved this Haydn, and he knew he was killing her, even after he was gone. he just let her cry and cry and cry, into his torso and into the night.


	12. chapter 12

Ben and Imogen couldn't sleep after sex. Ben just let her calm down, and she soon did. he gently rubbed the top of her arms.  
"you okay, sweetheart?" he whispered. she nodded and really wrapped her arms around him. she sniffed her blocked nose away and nodded. she knitted her eyebrows together.  
"I'm sorry, I, never really planned this, and it's been so long, Haydn..." she trailed off. she tried to hide her sobs.  
"Haydn was the last guy" she finished. she looked up with her wet face.  
"I'm sorry" she whispered. Ben moved his hand up to her face and gently whipped away her tears and left his cool hand on her warm face.  
"It was never you're fault..." he spoke quietly, and kissed her on her forehead. he whipped her tears away again.  
"come on, I don't want you to have nightmares now." he pleaded. Imogen nodded and sat up, using the duvet to cover up her nakedness. she looked around.  
"wow, we really made a mess..."she chuckled quietly. the cover of the bed was the only thing that was not on the floor. Imogen leaned forward and picked up her smoking materials. she was soon rolling half way, when she stopped.  
"fancy a fag?" she asked. Ben thought for a moment.  
"you know what, go on then" he smiled and sat up beside her. she finished rolling the first one and handed it to him. she passed him the lighter and the ash tray.  
"one off?" Imogen asked. Ben nodded and lifted the rollie to his lips to light it.  
"yer, well. I'm trying not to make a habit of it, but, hey, I have to smoke for my career sometimes" he replied and took a drag. Imogen was soon smoking as well.  
"what's the time?" he asked. Imogen turned around to her side table and pressed the button on her phone.   
"one thirty two in the morning" she replied. Ben scoffed.   
"Trust me to keep you up" he chuckled. Imogen shrugged.  
"stuff happened" she replied. Ben looked at her, she was simply sitting there next to him, and even now, still in the dim candle lit room, she looked beautiful. she looked down at the remains of the rollie she smoked and took one last drag, before sorting out the end and passing the ash tray to Ben who did the same and then placed the tray on the side table next to him. he then shifted to on his side and laid his arm arm out to welcome Her into his embrace. she gladly accepted, and gently rubbed the front of his torso and shoulder blades.  
"what's you're favorite thing you've ever done in you're career?" she asked.  
"I don't know. I'v done so much, I never really have a favorite thing in my career" he replied softly. Imogen starred into his torso.  
"what's you're favorite things then? other than the Beatles, I already know" he asked. Imogen sighed and gently smiled.  
"I love films, a rather large taste in different things. mostly animation and clay-mation, only because i admire the work and effort put into it. I also love factual, biography sort of films. not much on horror. but, romantic comedies are getting a little over rated nowadays"   
"so, favorite films, has to be Corpse Bride, The nightmare before Christmas, a LOT of Disney movies and finally-" she paused and smiled. Ben frowned.  
"the fifth estate" she finished. they both laughed gently. she shifted and gently pushed Ben so he was now on his back and that Imogen was inches from his face. Ben moved his hand up her back and gently rubbed it.   
"you look good with white hair" she smiled. Ben wrinkled his nose.  
"no thanks, It wasn't the best thing i'v done" he spoke modestly.  
"well, you got you're point across, played Julian so well, I bet he's jealous he isn't you. Like a lot of men to many girlfriends in this world" she chuckled. Ben smiled as Imogen laid her head across his chest. the began gently brushing her hair with his fingers. he looked down.  
"Imogen?" he asked.  
"hmm?" she hummed.  
"did, you want this to go on? or, is this just a one night thing for you?" he asked. Imogen didn't move. after a few moments of silence, she raised her head and looked at Ben.  
"do you want this to go on?" she asked. Imogen starred at him.  
"be honest" she replied quickly after.  
Ben didn't say anything for a minuet, but he soon nodded.  
"yes." he replied. Imogen gave possibly the biggest smile of her life and gently kissed him.   
"good. because I want to as well" she replied, nestling into his torso, and soon began falling to sleep with Ben gently rubbing her back.   
"Goodnight Imogen" he whispered.  
"Goodnight, Benedict" she replied, and they where soon both out like a light, like the candles minuets after them.


	13. chapter 13

The next few weeks went neither smoothly nor roughly. the news that Imogen and Ben where dating reached the public, and soon Imogen was getting death threats and people in the street harassing her. not to mention all the hurtful comments on the internet. obviously, her parents heard and it did not surprise them, as they heard all the commotion coming from Imogen's bed room the night nearly six weeks back. Ben came over frequently, and even Imogen had been over to meet his parents. they where two very lovely people, and she could tell where Ben got his looks from. work was pretty normal as well, she was not only working on Ben, but also Tom Hiddlestone, David Thewlis and the actual star of the film, the horse it's self. it was called War horse. the two other men where easy to work with, and had they had rather enjoyable convocation, but the horse on the other hand was a different story. Imogen was way out of her comfort zone, as she wasn't use to working on animals, let alone horses. but she got the job done none the less. so far, Life was pretty good, and it was now the night before her best friend's wedding. Imogen sat behind Sophie in her dressing room, brushing Sophie's now long, blond hair. they had been taking shots of vodka.   
"so, you getting excited?" Imogen broke the silence. Sophie gave a laugh as she saw Imogen make a funny face in the reflection in the mirror.  
"I really, really am. I'M FINALLY GETTING MARRIED!" she screamed along with Imogen.  
"but not as excited as i am for you! you're one of the worlds most promising actor's girlfriend! this is fucking impossible!" she started bouncing in her seat now.  
"AND HE'S COMING TO MY WEDDING!" she laughed. all Imogen could do was sit there and laugh, but something was on her mind.  
"yer, thanks again for inviting him" she replied and started to plate her hair. Sophie downed another shot and shook her head.  
"my pleasure. it's not every day Sherlock comes to my wedding now, is it?" he laughed. Imogen smiled. Sophie frowned and turned her head to look her in the face.  
"OK, what is up with you? and don't go telling me shit now" She spoke a little sternly. Imogen shifted uncomfortably. Sophie sighed and dragged her to her double bed. they where both sitting cross legged and Sophie gave her the stare. Imogen sighed.  
"well, it's actually about Ben..." she trailed off. Sophie's face turned evil.  
"fuck, what has he done? if he hurt you-" she began but was cut off when Imogen raised her hands.  
"no, no! we both know Ben would never do something like that..." Sophie kept glaring at her.  
"well then, what's the problem?" she asked. Imogen breathed in deep.  
"I should have been on my time of the month two weeks ago..." she trailed off. Sophie sat there frozen for a minuet.  
"Soph-" Imogen Began, but was cut off by a rather loud scream. she screamed again and calmed down.  
"so, what? are you?" she yelled. Imogen shrugged.  
"I really, really, don't know. and to be honest, I'm really scared.." she spoke quietly.  
"well, I can see that Hun, But why? why are you so scared?" she spoke with sympathy in her voice. Imogen let a tear roll down her face.  
"because this time it's for real" she replied in a low voice, remembering the lie she had told to Haydn. Sophie didn't say anything but looked at her watch.  
"it's only eight o clock, shops are still open. come on, where going to get you a pregnancy test" she said and got off the bed and started pulling her coat on.  
"I can't let you think of me on the night before you're wedding" Imogen replied. Sophie shook her head.  
"babes, me and Jacob can literally run down to the registration office, with me only dressed in a t-shirt and have our honey moon around the back of a dumpster for all I care. you could be carrying Ben's child! which is going to put you right at the top of the hit list with the public than you already are. so come on, put you're coat on." Imogen didn't argue. she did what she was told and followed her out of her house and down to Asda. they where soon up at the medical Isle, and Sophie was bobbing and weaving, keeping keen eye out for pregnancy tests. they soon found them, right at the bottom of the isle.  
"now, you don't want to go for the cheapest, they usually don't work." she explained.  
"yer, but I don't exactly want to go for the expensive one's either. you know how I am on money" Imogen replied. Sophie sighed and picked up one with pink flowers over it.  
"here, it's only seven quid. happy?" she shoved the box into her hands and Imogen looked at it, reading the words on the front and back of the box.  
"fine." she mumbled. Sophie smiled.  
"come on, I feel like pigging out" and she dragged her friend by the arm up the sweets isle.  
"literally, grab as much shit as you want. I'm buying" Sophie laughed. Imogen joined in and grabbed as many packets of skittles, Haribo's, minstrels and kinder chocolate as possible. Sophie had the roughly the same amount in her arms and they began tottering up to the tills to pay for all this. they spread there cargo onto the conveyer belt and Imogen casually threw the pregnancy test on top. The lady who was scanning all these items, gave a curious glare at Imogen.  
"Hey, aren't you that Benedict Cumberbatch's girlfriend?" she asked. Imogen stopped in her tracks and quickly glanced at Sophie and then back to the person who has just finished scanning the last bag of sweets.  
"no, no I don't think so" she lied and started stuffing the bags of sweets into the plastic bags. she reached out snatched the pregnancy test out of the lady's hand just as she scanned it. Sophie wanted to get out of here as much as Imogen did and literally threw a twenty pound note at the lady's face.  
"keep the change" she said, grabbed the bags, and ran towards the door along with Imogen, carrying the bags. Imogen glanced behind her and saw people getting out there cameras.  
"shit, RUN!" Imogen yelled. Imogen and Sophie ran through the scanners, jumped over the escalators, running down the hand of them, which was rather an awkward situation. they jumped at off at the end and ran out into the dark.  
"quick, into the shadows!" she whispered loudly. Imogen nodded and followed her into this little alley way.  
"get down!" Sophie whispered and they ducked down into the darker shadows. they saw all the people run pass and they both laughed.  
"you know, if you are pregnant, you really cant do stunts like that" Sophie laughed while trying to get her breath back.  
"yer, I can also kiss goodbye to the late night drinks with you" she replied.  
"come on then. let's go home" Sophie said and got up. she held her hand out and Imogen gladly accepted.  
"let's just keep to the shadows, yeah?" Imogen suggested. Sophie just laughed.  
***  
"how you doing in there?" Sophie spoke normally while knocking at the bathroom door. Imogen didn't reply.  
"come on, Imo! you've been in there for nearly ten minuets. you up the duff or what?" she said.  
Imogen stopped starring the white stick in her hand. she stood up and opened the door. Sophie sighed. Imogen held the stick up.  
"I'm pregnant"


	14. chapter 14

Imogen and Sophie sat in silence on Sophie's double bed, starring at the little white stick between them. Sophie knitted her eyebrows together.   
"when did you two even fuck anyways?" Sophie asked.  
"I mean, I know you're together, and sex can be important, but was this before you where going out?" she trailed off. Imogen didn't speak a word, nor a glance up. she just sat and starred.  
"you need to tell him" Sophie finally said, which made Imogen snap out of her trance and look up. she sighed.  
"I know, but, it would be easy for you. you're getting married. if you get pregnant, then Jacob and you would be extremely happy. if I told Ben, what would happen? I don't like to think it, but this is real life. I need to think all of my options..." she whispered. Sophie stood up and slapped Imogen every so gently around the face.  
"I would hit you harder, but you're pregnant. and you need to think about the other options, like telling Ben for one. and even, no, when, he finds out, we both know him well enough to know he's not one of those people to leave. besides, the way he's around you, he seems to really care about you, and I don't say that about everyone" Just before Imogen was about to reply, the ringtone of Bob Marley began playing from her pocket. she reached in it and saw it was Ben calling.   
"it's Ben..." Imogen spoke. Sophie glared at her.  
"tell him" she said sternly.  
"not over the phone" Imogen mouthed and answered the call.  
"hey" she barley whispered.  
"hey, just wanted to call if you're okay" his memorable voice echoed down her ear canal.  
"yer, I'm fine" her voice was horse.  
"I don't Believe that for a second" he said jokingly down the phone.  
"really Hun, i'm fine" she changed her voice to try and convince him. Sophie was giving her the glare again.   
"Okay, well, I'll be seeing you tomorrow, oh, that reminds me, I'll be working the morning shift with Tom and David, I was just wondering, if perhaps, they could come to the reception?" he asked.  
"okay, Let me just ask Sophie" she replied.  
"Sophie, Ben want's to know if he can Invite Tom Hiddlestone and David Thewlis to the wedding tomorrow" she spoke. Sophie shook her head.  
"who are they?" she asked. Imogen sighed.  
"Loki and Professor Lupin" and with those words, Sophie screamed. she snatched the phone out of Imogen's hand and smashed it to her ear.  
"YES YES YES!!!" she screamed down the phone and threw it back at Imogen. she laughed and raised it to her ear.   
"I think that's a yes" she chuckled.   
"thanks again sweet, and, we'll talk tomorrow, because I know something is up" he spoke. Imogen nodded.  
"Okay" she finally gave up.  
"Okay, I love you" he finally spoke. Imogen smiled.  
"I love you too" she whispered back. Sophie smiled.  
and with that, he hung up. Sophie sighed.  
"why didn't you tell him?" she asked, not so sternly.  
"because I need to tell him face to face" she replied. she looked at her watch, ten forty five.  
"OK, but TOMORROW. you will tell him" Sophie sternly told her.  
"but for now, bed. it's you're wedding day tomorrow, and you are going to need every wink of sleep you can get" Imogen told her, being the boss now. they both got changed into there night clothes and both slipped into the double bed, ready for Sophie's wedding day, and Imogen's confrontation with Ben.  
***  
"Sophie, stay still, I'm just applying the finishing touches!" Imogen whined, as Sophie was fidgeting in her seat. she had her eye's closed, because what Imogen had done, was too good.   
"OK, open you're eyes" Imogen spoke quietly. when Sophie opened them, she couldn't believe what she saw. her long blond hair war loosely pinned at the back with a crystal hair pin, and two long blond locks hung on each side of her face. a pure white lily was gently placed on the right side of her hair. her eyes bear a light eye liner with a light blue eye shadow hung on her eyelids. her dress clung to her shoulders and spread out flowing at her waist.  
"Imogen..." she was speechless. Sophie turned around.  
"what are you wearing?" Sophie moaned, as she saw Imogen still in her night gown.  
"you where more important" she spoke. Sophie smiled.  
"go and get dressed you silly goose" and she ushered her out the room.  
Imogen returned in a light blue knee high dress, with thing, string straps. a small blue rose was gently placed into her brides maids sash. her hair was freshly brushed and she worse the same make up as Sophie only heavier.  
"there, now we're both stunning" Imogen chucked and went over to fetch her small handbag. she opened it and her heart stopped beating. the Test from last night was in there. Imogen turned to Sophie.  
"you're telling him." she said. Imogen nodded, shut her bag, and walked downstairs with the bride to the car that would take her to the church.


	15. chapter 15

Ben saw her walk into the church with the Bride. she was absolutely stunning. she looked up and saw him starring, she smiled that stunning smile he loved. Imogen starred back. she always loved him in suits, and he didn't come his hair back, but instead left it in his usual, curly state. Imogen walked all the way up to the altar with Sophie. Jacob standing proudly, with his dark messy mop top and growing sideburns. Imogen was really getting emotionally now, as she and Sophie had been best friends since they where eight. Imogen could feel the tears rolling down her face as she and Sophie shared an emotional Hug, and Imogen passed her to Jacob and went over to stand by Ben, who immediately placed his arm around her. they all sat down and Imogen rested her head on his shoulder. the next 20 minuets where very emotional for Imogen and Sophie. they smiled at each other with tears in there eyes and a hopeful mind for each other with there future lives. they where soon all coming out the church and Imogen and Sophie ran into each other's embrace.  
"CONGRATULATION'S MRS SOPHIE BILL!" Imogen cried happily into her best friends ear.  
"THANK YOU MRS-SOON-TO-BE-CUMBERBATCH!" she screeched. Imogen laughed and looked into her friends face.  
"not yet Sophie" she smiled sadly. with those words Sophie grabbed her hands.  
"well, its going to be 'yet' Mrs Sherlock" and she grabbed her bouquet, turned around quickly glanced at Imogen, and just as she was a bout to throw it in the traditional bride manner, just as all the other girls where going crazy and reaching there long arms out to grab it, Sophie spun around and threw it into Imogen's chest. she had no choice to catch it. all the other girls let out a moan of disappointment.  
"Like I said, thank you, Mrs Cumberbatch" she winked and walked off to get in for the wedding photos. Ben walked over.  
"look's like its our turn next" he chuckled. Imogen gulped and laughed nervously.  
"yer I guess" she spoke.  
"so, whats wrong? I thought we where going to talk today" He spoke and looked at her. she looked up and gave a small smile.  
"we are. there is something I need to tell you any way" she began, but was soon cooed over by Sophie.  
"come on guys! family photo!" she laughed. Imogen sighed.  
"can it wait to later?" she asked. he smiled and nodded. Sophie came running up to her.   
"come on, Imo! you in the picture as well, Ben!" she laughed and dragged the brides maid over to the spot where her newly wedded husband stood. she stood next to him and he comfortably placed his arm around her. Sophie saw the two awkwardly standing side beside.  
"come on Ben! give her some more affection!" Sophie laughed. Ben breathed in, grabbed Imogen by the waist, spun her around, leaned down and gave a passionate kiss. Sophie just stood there shocked and with a loud snap of the camera, the photographer nodded. But that didn't stop Ben and Imogen. she had placed both arms around his neck. there lips perfectly in sync. there where a few laughs and a couple of coughs coming from the guests. eventually Sophie had to pull them apart.  
"wow, when I said give her a little affection!" she laughed. Imogen couldn't laugh as she was out of breath but made out a smile. Ben did the same.  
***  
they where soon at the reception hall, and the DJ's music was blasting from the speakers. people had started drinking and people had started dancing. there where little kids, throwing things they didn't like from the buffet table, and finally the older kids where gathered all around Ben's friends Tom and David. a majority of them harry potter fans and where amazed that a were-wolf of Hogwarts teachers had come to there mummy's friend wedding. Imogen was laughing her head of next to the bride at the head table. Sophie was already half wasted, but Imogen hadn't drank a thing other than orange juice. and even that was making her feel sick. suddenly, Sophie and Imogen's song began playing from the speakers.  
"oh, my god! Imo! we gotta" *hiccup* "get up there and sing!" she laughed hysterically. Imogen laughed and took Sophie's hand.   
"come on then!" she laughed and they both ran up to the DJ'S booth like two excited school girl. they soon got microphones. they placed there arms over each other arms and began to sing/ screech.

"Unconditional, unconditionally  
I will love you unconditionally  
There is no fear now  
Let go and just be free  
I will love you unconditionally!"  
Sophie murmured on the last line, while Imogen was really trying.

"So come just as you are to me  
Don't need apologies  
Know that you are all worthy  
I'll take your bad days with your good  
Walk through the storm I would  
I do it all because I love you  
I love you"  
they sang in Unison. Imogen could feel Ben and his friends starring at the pair, making her blush red.

soon the song finished and Sophie Raised the mic to her mouth.  
"Ladies and Gentlemen, this, beautiful girl, standing next to me! she is my best friend! we have been through thick and thin and I could not possibly be standing her, at my reception, on my wedding day, without my amazing best friend, and the love of my life!" she yelled. she placed the mic down and got two glasses of wine. she gave one to Imogen, and then picked up the mic again with her free hand.  
"I want to be doing this on you're wedding day Imogen, Because I want you to experience as much happiness as I have felt today. I want you, and Mr bloody Sherlock Holmes over there" she pointed out bluntly to Benedict over on the table with his two fellow actors. he waved and there where a few laughs from the crowd.  
"I want you and Him, to have lots of babies and marriage and all that shit, because" she paused, let out a loud burp which made more laughter roar.  
"Because you and him really deserve each other. Ladies and gentlemen, a toast, to my best friend!" she yelled. everyone let out a sound of joy and took swigs of there drinks. Imogen didn't though. Sophie saw this and because she was drunk, she had completely forgotten Imogen's situation.  
"go on, have a drink!" she yelled. Imogen grimaced.  
"no, thanks" she replied. Sophie turned evil.  
"it's my wedding day. have.a.drink" she spoke. Imogen, not wanted to argue, downed the whole glass. Sophie smiled and pattered her on the back.  
"nice!" she laughed.   
"okay people, speeches in ten minutes!" the bride screamed. Imogen gave a fake smile but it changed into a scared look when everyone went back to dancing. knowing she had a bad feeling about tonight.


	16. chapter 16

Imogen was really panicking now, she didn't know what to do but just stand there in front of people dancing. a scared look stuck on her face. she glanced up and saw saw Ben starring at her. his face showing concern. he stood from his seat and tried to make his way to her through the crowd. he was so close to her now, but his path was block when a drunk Sophie crashed into him.  
"ooh Benny! lemme' have' a dance wiv' ya!" she laughed and was casually dragging him around in awkward circles. Ben looked at back at Imogen and saw her burst into tears.  
"wow, Imo's so lucky, to 'ave ya!" she hiccuped into his chest. Ben pulled a fake smile and nodded quickly, trying to keep his eyes on Imogen as she ran off stage. this situation had never been so awkward and he didn't know how to get out of it.  
"Mind If i cut in?" his friend's voice spoke behind him. Tom stood there and smiled at him.  
"of course, please do." he said and gently shoved Sophie off his chest and into the arms off Tom Hiddlestone.  
"go and find her" Tom spoke to Him and winked. he knew that she was in trouble. Ben smiled, patted him on the back.  
"cheers mate" he said and ran off to find Imogen. he ran out into the corridors, but the where empty and littered with smashed glasses and empty crisp packets and other pieces of litter. he sighed, ran back inside the crowded main hall and ran out the back door. nothing but smokers, and even Imogen wasn't in with them. he sighed again and was about to give up. when he saw the hem of a light blue dress flick around the corner. he ran up to it and found Imogen sitting on the stump of tree that was recently cut down. she had tears rolling down her face.  
"hey, what's wrong?" he asked as he walked in front of her and knelt down, so his face was at her level. she looked up and starred into that innocent face of his. it was blustery outside and Imogen's body was freezing up. he felt her hand and nearly jumped.  
"Christ, you're freezing" he mumbled and took his suit jacket off and placed it around her shoulders.  
"Ben...." she started her voice was horse. she looked up.  
"I'm pregnant" she spat out. her eyes filling with more water. Ben's face froze. he couldn't believe what he was hearing.  
"say it again" his voice low and rough. Imogen looked slightly taken back.  
"I'm pregnant" she repeated. Ben was frozen.  
"Ben, sweet-" she began was cut off by a kiss from the actor. they parted lips and Imogen expressed a mixed emotional face expression.  
"you-you're not mad?" she whispered. Ben laughed and shed a tear.  
"how can I be mad? what-what? how-? oh you know what, it doesn't matter" he smiled and helped her stand. he placed one arm around her waist and the other on her abdomen.   
"I thought, you would have thought this too fast, and i thought it would have gotten in you're career path" she whispered. Ben laughed and let more tears fall down his face.  
"Imogen, I'v been acting for half my life, this is, the life with you, is just the side of life that i have never experienced. and I want more than anything, to have this life with you and our child more than anything" he explained and smiled. Imogen couldn't speak. she tried but all they came out was squeaks. Ben just laughed, took her in his arms and let her sob her heart out with happiness. they parted from there hugs and smiled at each other. Ben wiped away her tears and kissed her on the cheek. suddenly, they where interrupted as David walked up to them. they both looked at him and smiled.  
"the Bride says it's time for the speeches" he said. Imogen nodded and thanked him. she walked away up to the door and went inside. Ben gave possibly the biggest smile he ever had.  
"what's happening?" David asked. Ben gave a short laugh.  
"I'm gonna be a dad!" he laughed. David cheered and patted him on the back.  
"congratulations!" David laughed. Tom came up to the both  
"what are congratulations for?" he asked.  
"Ben's gonna be a father" David said Simply. Tom smiled.  
"ah, well done mate" he smiled and patted him on the back.  
"come on then, we better go in and listen to people make a fool of themselves" David laughed. always the optimist Ben thought sarcastically.  
they all walked in to the hall, everyone was sitting down apart from the people lining up to have there say on the the bride and groom. Imogen was waiting at the back, looking like she was about to faint, but she didn't and smiled at Ben. he smiled back and gave a little wave.  
soon, it was just Imogen left. she was handed and the microphone. she had gone extremely pail, but was still smiling.  
"Sophie. you are one of the most important people in my life.  
and I know you'll make a great wife.  
meeting you was such a blessing.  
and I'm honored, to be at you're wedding.  
I cant believe through all these years,  
we've stuck together, through laughs and tears.  
I love you Sophie never forget,  
till the day we die, and from the moment we met" she smiled. she breathed in and knitted her eyebrows together.  
"Sophie, i wrote that poem just for you. you've always been there for me, and i'v always been there for you. but it seems now that, that time is at an end. I am so proud to pass you, to someone who will love u just as much as i did, but in a different way. Jacob, I need you to do that for me" she asked. Jacob smiled and nodded. Imogen smiled back at Sophie.  
"and, Sophie, you got you're wish. finding a perfect husband, and, Also you being an aunt" Imogen laughed. Sophie stood, mouth opened as far as she could.  
"oh my god, SHE'S PREGNANT!" she screamed. she laughed happily and there was a loud applause from the audience.   
"yes, I am. to be honest, I only just found out myself. But, if i have a girl, I want her to find someone Like you in her life, and had the life that we had-" she stopped. body and voice. within 2 minuets of silence of people looking worried. Imogen screeched out in pain and fell to the floor. dropping the microphone that made that horrible sound. Ben ran over and pushed through the crowd to find Imogen sprawled out on the floor. her eye lids slowly closing her body twitching in pain.  
"Imogen, w-w-what's wrong?" Ben whispered out. Imogen shifted and gave another screech of pain. Ben looked down at her legs and now saw her light blue dress turning crimson red. she soon began to sob in pain. her breathing heavy.  
"SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE!" Ben yelled, holding Imogen's hand. Sophie ran to her purse and yanked her phone out, and began dialing the number. the room was now filled with murmurs and the music had long stopped playing.   
"Imogen, come on, stay with me" Ben whispered. Imogen looked up through the slits in her eyes and finally blacked out.


	17. chapter 17

"When you were here before,   
couldn't look you in the eye.   
You're just like an angel,  
your skin makes me cry.   
You float like a feather,  
in a beautiful world   
I wish I was special,   
you're so fucking special.

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here. 

I don't care if it hurts,   
I want to have control.   
I want a perfect body,  
I want a perfect soul.  
I want you to notice,  
when I'm not around.   
You're so fucking special,  
I wish I was special."

Imagine all the pain in the world. emotional and physical combined, crammed, crushed, squeezed into one emotion. you may think it's impossible, and in a way, it is. but in another way it isn't. think about all the pain our world faces today, like, poverty, war, bullies, hunger. and then take the emotional side, like depression, anxiety, anger, sadness, guilt. Imagine all of that into one emotion. Most people don't know how it feels to lose a child, born or unborn. but for those who do, not even this explanation of this, are not enough words to describe a mother's loss.

Creep, by radio head played and rewound inside her head as she laid sprawled on the bed with wheels, being dragged through the hospital. all she knew, was that the lights where to bright, and her pretty blue dress had been ripped off her and was most likely being burned because of the stained blood that had ruined the satin forever. she didn't know what was happening. she didn't want to know. all she knew was that she was awake. but half her mind was screaming she was dead and was passing through judgement on whenever she was going to heaven or hell. the lights where so bright, it blinded her. she couldn't move. she couldn't speak. she tried to cry out for help, thinking she was forever broken. she screamed inside, struggled against her locked muscles. but all she could do, was lay there and complain in her head the light's where too bright. she managed to let out a sigh and close her eyes again, hoping she would never wake.

Unfortunately, she had to. she slowly opened her eyes to a dim lit room. it was small, only fit a bed, a few cupboards and the machine that stood next to her head. she knitted her eyebrows together and turned her head to look outside the small rectangular windows of the door that burst out beams of light. she could make out a man in a white lab coat talking to what seemed to look like her Ben. she couldn't make out his face that well, but she could tell he hadn't slept all night, after all, he was still in his suit from the wedding. she moved her head back to her original spot and looked down at her body. she was still in her hospital clothing, with an IV plugged into her main vein of her right arm. she felt cold and naked, because the material on her was light, and she could tell that she was only wear underwear beneath them. no bra. she felt so vulnerable. she hadn't felt this low since Haydn. Haydn. she hadn't thought of him in days. she wondered were he was, and what he would do or say if he were here now. she created a scenario in her head, where he was deeply upset and had to take her back. but the chances of that happening were impossible. he didn't have a heart. but still, if she did have this baby, she would have named it if it were a boy. not for sentimental purposes, keeping him in her memory. oh no. she would name him, simply because of the fact that at the end of the day she had beaten him. and naming her child after him seamed like a good idea to remind her self that she was strong and independent. but then there were days where she didn't feel like that. natural I suppose, she thought. suddenly her brain went into nostalgic mode, and began to play this song Imogen had found, just before she met Haydn. it was called 'Banished at Birth' by Alan the box, and it was featured in one of the my little pony MOV's, but she had fallen in love with it because it was bitter sweet and it described her life before Haydn, with Haydn and after Haydn all at once. a single tear rolled down her cheek as it played along with the memories. just then, it all stopped when the click of the door handle interrupted her thoughts. she turned her head and looked up to find a defeated Benedict walk in. she looked at his face. dark rings under his eyes, followed with blood shot eyes from crying. his hair ruffled along with his clothes, and the smell of sweat came from his ruffled, un-tucked blouse. he gently shut the door behind him and pulled up the chair in the corner, making a small scrapping sound against the floor. they didn't say anything but simply stare at each other, Ben finally having a small break down of tears again, of which Imogen soon followed. she sat up and wrapped her arms around him. softly crying into his shoulder. they soon stopped sobbing but never let go of each other.  
"what did the doctor say?" Imogen had never spoke like that. her voice was so horse it sounded completely different to her usual voice. Ben breathed in.  
"it, we" he began with another deep breath.  
"we lost it" he finally spoke. Imogen gently nodded and breathed in his scent.   
"am-am, I able t-to have, c-c-children again?" Imogen spluttered out. Ben pulled away and looked in her face, whipping her tears away. he nodded.  
"I asked, and he said there was nothing wrong with out Gene compatibility. it was, one of those things that happened. he said, give it a few months, and we can try again, if that's what you want" he explained quietly. Imogen nodded.  
"we need, to pick ourselves up, and carry on" Imogen finally spoke after minuets of silence. Ben looked up.  
"things happen, but to be honest Ben, it was barley a blob of cells. all in all, I must of been at least nearly five weeks..." Imogen spoke truthfully. Ben didn't say anything. Imogen looked up.  
"but that doesn't change the fact of what could of been" she started to cry again. Ben whipped her tears away again. he gently pushed her down on the bed and joined her after taking his shoes off. he held his arms out and Imogen immediately joined his embrace. they both silently cried into each other, hoping that there future would be better.


	18. chapter 18

Imogen was pushed up to her house in a wheel chair, pushed by Ben. he unlocked the door for her and gently got her into the house, shutting the door behind them. when they in, Imogen wheeled her self into the front room to find her parents, Sophie and Jacob, her grandmother (whom she had not seen in months) Gemma, and finally, whom she had never hoped to see again, Haydn, sitting in the chair at the back of the room.  
there was silence as she made her way to join the circle. Sophie stood up, she looked as if she had been crying her heart out for hours.  
"I-Imo, I'm so sorry. If i wasn't drunk enough, I would never had make you have that glass of wine. I'm, I-I'm so s-" she couldn't speak anymore and began to break down again. Jacob got up and began to comfort her. Imogen kept a fixed stare at Haydn. Imogen closed her eyes.  
"Sophie, it's not you're fault. it never was. I just want to say something. Sophie, this includes you. if any of you, think this unfortunate accident was either you're fault, or you believed that you could have caused it. then stop right there. because it wasn't anyone's fault. it was just one of those things that randomly happen in life. if you honestly don't believe this, well, you're not doing anyone any favors because I cant move on from this without people think its my fault. I don't even believe its my fault, for fucks sake" Imogen's eyes were starting to water a little. Imogen's mother piped up.   
"none of us do sweetheart, but we just want to let you know, that we will do anything to help you. we know this type of pain won't end, but we can try and help you carry on with life." everyone in the room nodded. Imogen, who was grateful was a little pissed now.  
"thank you, everyone, but hang on a minuet" everyone stared at her as Imogen gave an evil glare at Haydn.  
"everybody who is my family or closest's friend are in this room at the moment. you all know what I'v been through for the past two years. so, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS HE DOING HERE!" she screamed at her last words and pointed at Haydn.  
"AND DON'T GO SAYING I STILL LOVE HIM, BECAUSE THAT'S BULLSHIT!" Imogen saw so angry she got out her wheel chair and walked straight up to Haydn.  
"how the fuck, could I love someone who made empty promises that deeply meant something to me and then goes and breaks them. and then thinks 'hey, I fucking know, lets fuck with her head some more, go up to south Hampton and never come back?'" she whispered harshly, as she glared into his hazel eyes. he knitted his eyebrows together.  
"you really feel that way?" she hadn't heard his voice in such a long time. she felt weak for a moment and let all the emotions come flooding back. she didn't say anything for a minuet as she rewound history. but then, she turned and took one glance at Ben, and everything she ever had with Haydn had gone. as if it never happened and he was a stranger sitting in the house. Imogen looked back at Haydn.  
"I do" she spat hatefully. Haydn looked at at the floor.  
"go" she said. Haydn looked up at the faces of the people around the room. they all nodded.  
"I SAID, GO!" she screamed and with that, He left. she heard the front door close and her heart sunk. what had she done? what had she-. no. stop thinking. Imogen told her self. she turned to face the others.  
"why would you-" Imogen began. Benedict piped up.  
"he contacted me. he found out I was dating you and I thought-" he began but Imogen raised her hand. she threw her arm down and let the tears fall down her cheeks.  
"you thought? you thought what? that it would be good for me to see him again? especially after just what's happened? no, Ben, no." she tried hard to not break down. she walked across the room and walked past Ben. she stopped just at the doorway.  
"I told you everything, how I felt about him, I never said I wanted to see him again" she whispered and walked up stairs to lock her self in her bedroom, leaving everyone in silence.


	19. Chapter 19

Imogen slammed the door the behind her to her room. she was alone in complete darkness, and began to cry uncontrollably as she sunk into her bed. thoughts running through her head, of Haydn, the loss of her unborn child. Ben's child.   
"Kill me" she whispered to her self in darkness.  
"please, if there is a god, kill me, please. Because I cant take this anymore..." she spoke while tears still running down her face.  
"all I ever wanted" she paused. she couldn't believe she was talking to her self.  
"all i ever wanted, was to be loved. not be destroyed by it" she cried gently. so many feelings ran through her body, that eventually she became numb and just lay there, cheeks stained with dried tears, starring up at the ceiling. eventually, she sat up and just sat there, starring at the Viv where her corn snake slept. she sighed and was about to get some sleep when there was a light knock at the door. she wiped her eyes as fast as she could with a hurried 'come in'. after the blinding light hit her eyes, she could make out it was Ben. he smiled a small smile.  
"hey..." he started. Imogen looked up and smiled back.  
"hey" she smiled sadly. he moved into the room and shut the door a little, leaving a little light in the room.  
"you look terrible" he began. Imogen let out a small laugh.  
"thanks" she laughed. Ben joined her but both their faces went to back to being serious.  
"I'm so, so sorry... I didn't know what you're true feelings we're, I was only doing what I thought was right..." he trailed off. Imogen gently nodded.  
"I know, I'm sorry, I shouldn't over reacted. I'm such a drama queen at the best of times..." she smiled a little. she looked up.  
"it was neither both of ours fault" she finally spoke. Ben smiled and gently pressed his lips against hers.  
"I do love you, you know that?" Imogen spoke, eyes filling with tears.  
"of course I do, and I love you too" he replied meaningfully. Imogen gave a saddened smile.  
"please, just don't do, what Haydn did. please don't break me anymore that I already am" she whispered. Ben's eyebrows knitted together.  
"I would never do what that spineless snake in the grass would do to you." he spoke, as he wrapped his arms around her and burred his nose into her short black hair. Imogen smiled and inhaled the scent of his shirt.  
"I love you." Imogen spoke.  
"I love you two" Ben replied. Imogen looked up and gave him a gentle kiss. which turned into something passionate, but Imogen had to stop. Ben gave a confusing look.  
"sorry, no sex for two weeks" she replied with a frown. Ben nodded slightly.  
"I think we are both two tired for it at the moment" he replied. Imogen nodded, yawned and suddenly felt exhausted. Ben smiled, got up and began to help her get undressed. he tucked her in and soon joined her after he removed his shirt and trousers. he took her into his embrace. Imogen gave a gently frown as his hand skimmed across her abdomen. Ben saw this.  
"we'll try again, give it time" he whispered, and those where the last words she heard before she was pulled into sleep.


	20. chapter 21

weeks soon followed after that tragic accident. the weeks turned to months, and Imogen was back at Long cross studios, working hard on new films. she had gained promotion and was now working as head make up artist. it was a lot more harder, choosing new staff, and making new timetables for the team each week on who were working on who. Imogen grew friendlier with Lisa, the first person she met on her first day. they had soon became work buddies, helping each other out on both of their jobs, giving opinions and ideas for new films and sets. also stopping for a coffee at lunch a few times a week. Imogen had all her emotional pain out, well, most of it. but it turned into a small lump in her throat she could not swallow. yet she picked her self up and worked to distract herself. Haydn had gone. completely out her mind. other than just stopping to think back on those pain full memories once every two months, she had finally gotten over him, and it was all thanks to Ben. if he didn't bring him to the house after, then she would have had no closure, and would still be thinking of Haydn everyday. she owed it to Ben. Him and her we're still going on strong, and now it had been at least a year and a half since they we're going out, the public had died down and seemed to accept Imogen and Ben as one of the top ten celebrity couple of the year. or so Imogen found out on Facebook. she had to change her name on her original account, as fans tried to add her to meet Ben. her name was now 'Imogen ward' which was rather annoying, as she took pride in her last name. so much background history was in Edwards. her grandfather on her dads side was in the RAF and her grandmother was admiral in the war office in world war II. her mothers side, was filled with Londoners and drug addicts. she didn't much care for what they did in their spare time, but they we're family after all, and her and her cousin we're rather close. Ben and Imogen had not had sex since Haydn came round, but it wasn't ruining their relationship. they both knew how they we're on the subject and how the life of an actor and head make up artist we're so busy, they hardly had time to think. but they we're both happy enough. Imogen was on her way to go to her Councillor meeting. she hated the idea, as most of her life she had been thrown into a room to talk about her feelings. but it did help. especially as loss of a child was a very emotional subject. she walked up to the doctors and went up to the desk.  
"Hi i have a meeting with Pam Nicholson" she asked the small old woman with a bad limp at the desk. the lady looked up at her computer. she knitted her eyebrows together and looked up at Imogen.  
"I'm afraid Pam is not in this week as she is on holiday. there is an substitute who will take her place" she said in a kind voice and gave a sweet grandma looking smile. Imogen smiled back.  
"no problem, has my time changed at all?" she replied. the lady nodded.  
"no, not at all. could I have you're name please?" she asked.  
"Imogen Edwards" she replied.  
"yes, go through and she will call you through" Imogen smiled and walked through the doors to the waiting room. she took a seat and looked around. she had been going to this place ever since she was eight. they still had the old chalk board and small red plastic chairs in another small room next to the seats where she sat. the whole small room covered in toys, where two identical twin boys played with a transformer toy. Imogen smiled as they laughed. they must be at least seven. they wore blue and white striped rugby shirts, with black trousers and Ben 10 trainers. they both had beautiful mop top mouse brown hair. Imogen starred through the glass window, thinking that she would love twins. always a bundle of fun. and how she would have the urge to call them Fred and George, only because Ben had a ginger tone in his roots. one of the boys caught Imogen's glare and he gave the sweetest smile. Imogen smiled back and gave a little wave. the boy laughed and nudged his brother, getting him to look at Imogen. they both gave a dramatic wave with the biggest smiles on their faces. Imogen gave a small muffled chuckle and waved back. the woman, sitting opposite Imogen looked up, then to the boys and back to Imogen. she had mid length brown hair, it was very messy but it suited her. she looked up from her news paper and smiled.  
"my, they seemed to have a fondness for you" she spoke in an Irish accent. Imogen looked at her and smiled.  
"they yours?" Imogen asked. the woman nodded and beckoned them over here. they both ran out the glass room and up to their mother.  
"this are my two lovely boys, Mark and Dylan" they boys hid shyly behind their mother. Imogen chuckled and gave another little wave.  
"how can you tell them apart? I guess it doesn't help you've dressed them the same either?" Imogen had to ask. the woman gave a little laugh.  
"when you're a mother of twins, you just know which is which. do you have children?" she asked. Imogen lost her smile a little and knitted her eyebrows together the little. the woman showed sympathy.  
"oh, I didn't mean to pry dear" she spoke in a sympathetic voice. Imogen shook her head. just then, the woman called her name.  
"It was nice to meet you" Imogen's voice slightly broke and she speed walked up to the doors leading to a small room. trying to suck her tears back in.


	21. chapter 22

Imogen shut the door behind her as she knew what room to go to. she sat in to the little wooden chair with a green cushion glued to it. she looked up as she saw a rather old, shorter and rather chubby woman with glasses walk into the room. Imogen squinted. she swear she knew her from somewhere.  
"well, its been quite a while hasn't time Imogen?" she smiled. Imogen gasped and gave the biggest smile she could. It was Margret Wilson! her old Councillor during her school days who she had grew attached too. she stood up and gave her a hug.  
"hello! oh my god, its been years!" Imogen laughed as she sat back down as Mrs Wilson joined her.  
Margret chuckled  
"well yes I think it has. now how has things been? I've been seeing you in the papers! I think I'm a little jealous of you" she said jokily. Imogen smiled.  
"every girl in the world is apparently" she replied. Margret nodded.  
"I bet that is quite stressful" she asked. Imogen shrugged.  
"not as bad as it was when me and Ben started. everyone just seems to accept us now" Imogen sighed.  
"and to be honest, I don't miss it. I was popular for bad reasons in school. wish this curse would end" Imogen mumbled.  
"what do you mean? do you not love Benedict?" she questioned. Imogen snapped out of her trance.  
"No! that's not what I meant at all. I love Ben. so much. It's unbelievable, It just, sometimes I wish he didn't act. we never have sex anymore because hes just so tried. and I'm just as tired." Imogen sighed. Marget nodded.  
"well, perhaps you could get away? have a break from all this. I'm sure you both deserve one" she suggested. Imogen thought. perhaps it would be best. but there is so much work to do.  
"maybe" she sighed. Marget began to write notes.  
"so what has been new with you? we really need a catch up for the last seven years" and so, Imogen began telling her. how she got distinctions from collage. how she suffered through Haydn. how she got her job and met Ben. then onto the matter of her miscarriage. when they finished, Margret gave her number and told her to give her monthly updates. Imogen walked out the doctors with her head held high. she felt she could do anything after she expressed her true emotions, she felt refreshed. she pulled out her phone as it began to ring. it was Ben. Imogen smiled and picked the phone up.  
"heyas" Imogen sung down the Phone.  
"hey, you seem happy" Ben laughed. Imogen huffed.  
"well, you would be two when you just bumped into an old friend you haven't seen for seven years" she laughed. Imogen could tell Ben was smiling down the phone.  
"so, hows work?" she asked. Ben coughed.  
"actually, we got let of early. I'm finished for today." he spoke happily. Imogen chuckled.  
"meet at my house?" she asked.  
"on my way now" he spoke and hung up. Imogen smiled and went to catch the bus home.

Ben and Imogen were sitting in the kitchen drinking tea. the weather was horrible. grey and chucking it down with rain. Ben knitted his eyebrows together and stretched in pain. Imogen got up and stood behind him.  
"you should take it easy, I've had bad backs in the past and they are not easy to get rid of" and she began to massage his tight shoulder blades. he sighed in relief.  
"hmm" he replied lost in pleasure. Imogen worked on his back for the next ten minuets when she thought it best to bring up a subject that had been on her mind for a while.  
"you still love me, don't you?" she whispered. Ben's eyes snapped open and looked up into her face. he turned his body around and placed his hand on her face.  
"of course I do, what's brought this on?" he asked with sympathy in his voice. a single tear rolled down her cheek.  
"you know what" she whispered again. Ben gulped. he took her in his arms and rested his chin on her head.  
"I know" he replied. the rain was hitting hard against the window now. Imogen looked up into his eyes and kissed him. he kissed her back. it soon turned passionate. Ben breathed out a few words.  
"are you ready for this yet?" he breathed. Imogen nodded quickly. he smashed his lips on hers and pushed her up against the kitchen counter. he moved his hands up under her shirt and forced his hand into her bra. Imogen gasped out load. they hadn't had it in such a long time and it was so urgent. Ben removed his hand from her bra, picked her up, threw her over his shoulder and ran upstairs towards her room. he threw her down rather forcefully on the bed and began to rip his shirt off, making it tear a little at the neck hole. Imogen began to do the same and they where both kissing roughly completely naked. Imogen could feel his hard on pressing against her stomach. she pushed him onto his back and moved her head down. her head stopped inches from his cock that gave off an unpleasant smell of sweat and something else. she took a deep breath and engulfed him. he groaned loudly she moved her mouth up and down his shaft. him nearly screaming out her name over and over. he snapped out of it and pulled her head off his man hood and brought her head up to his. he kissed her gently and rolled on top of her, gently moving to her neck, to her color bone and finally to her breasts, gently licking, sucking and nibbling her nipples. Imogen groaned and gasped out repetitively in pleasure. he there moved down, past her belly button and down to her thigh's. he gently kissed the inside of her thighs and finally her shaved pussy.   
"fuck!" Imogen gasped. Ben smiled and placed his tongue in make her curse out more swear words and cries of pleasure. he soon finished making her orgasm multiple times, he moved up to her head and kissed her, making her taste herself. they broke apart, looked at each other, smiled and fucked.


	22. chapter 23

"I have something to tell you" Ben spoke into her hair. Imogen opened her eyes slightly. it was getting late into the night.  
"hmm" she sighed. Ben smiled a little at the exhausted Imogen.  
Ben took a deep breath.  
"I'm going to America for a little while" he breathed. Imogen's eyes snapped open, she looked up, worry in her expression.  
"how long?" she asked.  
"seven months" he replied. Imogen knitted her eyebrows together.  
"we have to shoot a few scenes for our new film" he explained. Imogen gulped.  
"when do you leave?" Imogen breathed. Ben gulped.  
"four weeks, but you need to understand, I only found out today" he pleaded. Imogen nodded gently.  
"well we better make these next two weeks the best we've ever had" she replied and kissed him. and they began the next four weeks they had together.  
***  
the next four weeks flew by. Ben got time from work and so did Imogen. they went to on a few outings of London, Ben spoiled Imogen rotten, even though she hated being spoiled. he bought her an Ipad and some new shoes. also taking her to several expensive places to eat, followed by a romantic night at several five star hotels. But it went so fast and soon, Imogen and Ben were walking down the stairs after packing Ben's suitcase.  
"I promise to call every day. and write once a week" he smiled. Imogen laughed.  
"you act like this is a cheesy film! like Casablanca" she smiled. Ben chuckled, just then the cab honked it's horn, signaling his ride to the airport was here.  
"you know me, I'm a soft spot for those sort of films." and he took her into a long embrace.  
"here's lookin' at you kid" he quoted. Imogen smiled and felt a tear roll down her cheek.  
"I love you" Imogen began to get upset now.  
"and I love you two" he replied. after a long satisfying kiss, Ben walked out the door and got into the cab. Imogen waved until it was no longer in sight. she sighed and shut the door behind her. she leaned against the door and sighed. she took out the pregnancy test she had take that day without Ben looking and looked at the two pink lines to confirm it was positive. she collapsed to her knees and began to cry, realizing Ben was away during the most emotional and Important time of Imogen's life.


	23. thank you so much for reading!

thanks for reading guys! I really appreciate it! over eight hundred reads?!  
that's bloody brilliant for me anyway!  
so, because the Sherlock series is left on a cliff hanger, I've decided to leave this on a cliff hanger. I will be writing a sequel, but not for a little while as I have collage finals and exams coming up! but please, remember to keep an eye out on my profile, please you're thoughts and ideas on what I should include in the next book in the comments. remember to kudos this and follow me!  
thanks again guys! :) xxx


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